For a short while I have written a series of articles where I have used in the title the words: "...Sunday Thoughts". Because some of those thoughts either cross my mind on a Sunday, or got crystallized during a Sunday, while I was reading something or simply walking my dog.
Today is Monday but because of the holiday weekend here in America it truly felt like Sunday all day long.
So, I pretended that it is a Sunday thought, although it is a thought I've germinated for long time. I wander if any of you have had this thought...ever before...
...Basically, when you are a creative mind, which I have no doubt that I am one, your creativity extends not strictly of DIY or crafty stuff but to any life or business situation. People that I follow on Twitter had posted lately several articles about how important is creativity in the business environment, as well as how important coping the creative minds has became; contrary to the obsolete belief system that a creative person is just an actor, singer, painter, sculptor designer, or worst a day-dreamer or an air-headed floating around. Unfortunately creativity as a word needs to be rehabilitated, because its meaning have been sadly dis-empowered...
For way too long people adopted rules and a mechanism of thinking and living as opposed to adapting creatively of what it is put in front of them, as the life follows its course.
Ahh, some will hate me for saying it, but I can't help myself.... This was one of my biggest culture shock after I moved to US: the compulsive need in US to have everything labeled and under control. Things even like love and feelings had to be programmed and scheduled for the right life stage. I never really understood this, but I accepted it as the rule of the land (period).
Back to creativity! The problem could become even bigger for one, and I am talking from my own experience here, when your creativity is associated with a joyful personality. You are pretty much screwed, especially if you live in New York City, as some other parts of US. Europe is a different animal, and those of you who had a chance to know Europe more than simply a 10 days as a tourist, know exactly what am talking about. For the Americans, however, I need to be more specific, which I do not mind. Any marketer knows and accepts that although we all have two legs, two arms and a head, there are major differences between the markets behavior between the 5 continents. The globalization will take care of it, eventually, but that's not gonna happen overnight. Maybe not in my life time, as a matter of fact, although I would love to witness it.
In clear words: I believe that if YOU, just like me, are very creative, yet not grumpy, but quite cheerful, you will have harder time being taken serious in New York, where mostly being distraught and poker-faced is the norm of respectability and professional accomplishments.
That would be sad and painful enough on itself, but there is more to it: some would think that since your creativity bursts out when you speak and you appear to be navigate with a relaxed or highly expressive face, than you are a public property, in a sense, and anyone can pretty much come and take what they need out of you. Similar with a "eat what you can" buffet.
The problem arises when you are not easily exploitable. From my experience, so far, those who preyed on my creativity (or any other skills I might have, as a matter of fact), but they did not successed-ed of "serving" themselves freely of my ...(whatever they needed), had turned into my most ferocious enemies. Why? I have arrived to the conclusion that that happen because they felt betrayed by me not letting them exploiting me. As twisted as it sounds, yes, I encounter people with this way of thinking and reacting. They labeled me initially a sure victim-creative-airheaded and when I turned out not to be one, they got angry on me, instead of getting angry on themselves for their poor judgment.
Now that I have share some of my life experience with the world, I will tell you what compelled me to sit and write this article... It was an excellent (in my opinion) article I read in Forbes magazine, which although relates strictly to business, it has an underlining inter-human relationship message. And BTW, just the idea that business persona is completely separated of the personal persona is a nonsense. We carry the same personal traits, and experience, and life style into any business/profession that we happen to be in. The Pocker-face that I mentioned about earlier, is simply a cosmetic, a make-up. We are who we are in all department of our lives. And that real person comes out especially under pressure. I have never believed in separation between the personal life and professional life. Yes, I believe that if you have a fight with your spouse you better not continuing it with someone at work. But to believe that you can fundamentally be one person at home, and in your personal life, and a fundamentally different citizen in business and society it is a big bogus. A bogus that was conveniently accepted as universal truth, by many.
I don't believe it. Well, sue me!
THE FORBES ARTICLE THAT GOT ME WRITING TODAY, IS BELLOW:
Enjoy!
No, You
Can't Pick My Brain. It Costs Too Much
I
love giving advice. I write blogs, articles and a newsletter. I host a radio
show. I tweet, Facebook and share nuggets of advice almost daily. So what is it
in all of that, that would make anyone think they can still have the right to
“pick my brain”?
I can’t
tell you how flattering it is to be approached by representatives from major
companies seeking my wisdom and advice. It shows they are listening, and like
what I have to say.
But often I find the road
ends when they are just on a fact finding mission. That mission is to pick my
brain to gather as much free intel and knowledge they need to make their jobs
easier.
Not gonna happen, sorry. My
brain costs money to maintain. There’s training, classes to attend, reading (I
have to buy books), gaining certifications, costs of memberships so I can
network, attending conferences and mastering my skills that all cost me money.
I have to protect my
investment. How fair is it to me to give away all the knowledge I have acquired
that I use to make my living, pay my bills and eat?
Now, don’t get offended. If
you do, maybe you deserve to be offended because you’re one of those
aforementioned brain pickers.
There have been many
articles written and discussions formed around this very subject. With the
Internet being so widely available loaded with free information, people
automatically assume that you too have to provide information for free.
My response to that is go
ahead and read the free stuff. But when you still find yourself lacking
answers, then apparently the FREE stuff doesn’t work. You can’t come to a
professional and ask them to work for free. In essence, that is what you’re
doing when you ask to pick someone’s brain.
How would you feel if your
boss came to you and said, Hey since we can get this done from
information from the Internet, I won’t be paying you today. Go ahead, let
it sink in. Got that visual yet? Good. That’s exactly how I feel whenever
someone wants to take me to lunch or call me to pick my brain.
If you’re like (how I used
to be) you’ve given away tons of valuable information. I never once minded
helping people out. It’s the ones who keep coming back for more freebies and
those who take my ideas, implement them, find success, then never offer to
repay me for my time.
And no, a turkey sandwich
is not payment for something that helped you overcome an
obstacle and either created value or additional revenue for your company. I
charge my paying clients very good money for my expertise and
results. How would they feel to know that I’m giving out free advice? Not too
swell I would imagine. In fact I hope they don’t call me demanding refunds!
The most
prevalent question I get is how do you draw the line? Deciding the point where
you begin to charge is tough, especially if you’re just starting out.
But your
knowledge has value. You’ve invested time and money into learning your craft
and it’s not fair for people to expect you to give it away for free. Even
friends need to understand there are boundaries.
For example I will no
longer advise my friends or family for free. (Wow, I just made some people
mad….they’ll get over it!). I have businesses to run, employees to pay, a
mortgage to pay, an office rent to pay, college tuition, etc, etc, etc.
I’ve told this to friends
who have promptly replied, “Me too, you know I don’t have much money”. SO WHAT.
That means you either have to delay your plans or come up with the money to
fund your dreams. Period. Giving away information is the quickest way to end up
evicted or foreclosed on. Put that in proper perspective for a moment.
If you’re having problem
drawing the line in the sand, here are some rules of thumb you should follow:
·
Believe that what you know is valuable. If
it wasn’t then why are they coming to you? You’re their chance to solve a
problem or find a solution. That has value. Charge for it.
·
Create a fee schedule. Whenever
someone wants to pick your brain, make sure you have your fee schedule in front
of you. Give them a quote for how much it will cost them. They’ll either pay it
or move on. If they move on, good riddance. They weren’t interested in paying
you anyway. Let them figure it out on their own.
·
Decline lunch/coffee invitations unless they are
strictly non-business.If the conversation swings around to business,
quickly and politely tell them you’re off the clock. If they are interested in
a consult they can book an appointment and let them know what the charge is for
that.
·
Keep it light. Some of
you will probably cave and throw a few nuggets out there. If you do (I hope you
don’t), keep it general. Give the why and what but never the how. Anything
beyond the why and what comes with a charge. And don’t even point them in the
direction to obtain the how. That’s short changing yourself.
·
Prominently post that there are no freebies. OK
not in those words. But if you have a blog or website, and even on your social
media profiles, make sure you mention that consultations are available at a
fee.
·
Exchange for equal value. This
puts you in an advantageous bargaining position. If someone requests free
information or help, you must feel comfortable in asking for an in kind value
service. Assess what they have that can be of equal benefit for you. If they
are genuine, they should have no problem in an even exchange of knowledge. Only
you will know if what they have is equal to what you’re giving.
·
Refer them to your “free” resources. If
you write a blog, have published articles, have archived videos or podcasts or
have a show in which you dispense advice, refer them to that information.
Explain that those are the only free information sources you offer. Anything
specific or beyond what’s readily available has a cost.
·
Don’t be afraid to send them to Google. You
can recommend they go to Google, or any other search engine or to sites that
have articles or information about what they need advice on. You can also
recommend a book or magazine that might be helpful. Let them expend that energy
they would have used in meeting you at Starbucks and
hit the search engines to find their answers. Problem is, they’ll be
overwhelmed with varying degrees of information. Not fun for them, but when
they’re ready to put it in proper perspective and implement, they can come to
you…for a consult…a paid consult.
·
Ask them for a paying referral. If
they truly want your expertise, they have to be willing to help you out too.
It’s kind of like the Equal Exchange point I made above crossed with paying it
forward. Before you dispense any advice, ask them to provide you with referrals
to others who most certainly need (and can afford) your service.
·
Don’t back down. I
know it’s hard to say “no” sometimes. But you can’t back down. People will know
how far they can bend or push you. Stand firm, set your boundaries and guard
your treasures (your brain and the know how in it). The minute you compromise
you devalue yourself and your expertise.
Most people are afraid to
draw the hard lines in the sand for fear of angering a friend or losing a
potential client or opportunity. Trust me, if they will walk away because they
cannot get a freebie, they weren’t meant to be a client and there was no real
opportunity in it for you.
Many in the marketing
circles will tell you the freebie give away is vital. But it doesn’t always
lead to a sale. Likewise giving away what you would do in a given situation
during an interview will not necessarily lead to you being hired. It’s up to
you to determine what you’re willing to give away and how much of it. Know your
worth, understand your value. Stop being taken advantage of. No more freebies.
Til next time.
No, you can’t pick my
brain!
Stay tuned for the release
of my new book “Get Recruited: Secrets from a Top Recruiter to Use
Unconventional Tactics to Get Noticed in an Inconvenient Economy”
This article is
available online at:
